Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Death Dream

For two consecutive nights, I've been having the same unsettling dream --- that I killed someone and stashed this person's body inside a cabinet while plotting how to hide the evidence. I accidentally killed this person in my dream and it's been eating at my conscience. Have you ever had a dream like this?

According to, killing means that the dreamer is on the verge of losing self-control. The dream may also be expressing hidden negative emotions such as anger, particularly towards the person killed in the dream. Alternatively, the dreamer may also be trying to "kill" unwanted aspect of one's self or his/her undesirable characteristics.

True enough, I do have negative emotions towards the victim in my dream. Add this to the fact that my hormonal levels were at its peak the past few days. This emotional roller coaster always happens to me during the Yuletide season and I think my emotions were more on the surface this year. But this was the first time I dreamed of such gore. Maybe I was really on the verge of losing control. Perhaps this is why I was always tired and if I wasn't working, I was sleeping for hours at a time, just so I can ride out my mood swings.

This is actually the habit that I want to kill. I want to get out of my rut and start feeling happy again. It helps that I have another diary where I write everything as I think and feel them, no editing, no censoring. I've been feeling much better since. Hopefully, I'll have better dreams tonight. No more killing please.

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